Ray Douglas Ames

A Life Sketch of Ray Ames (October 4, 1924-January 27, 2006) Ray Douglas Ames entered this world on October 4, 1924, delivered by Dr. Hoon at the family home in the town of Zurich, Blaine County, Montana. He joined his parents, James William and Vivian Anna Jacobson Ames, and seven siblings, six sisters and one brother--Vanda, Madge, Virginia, Mildred, Aurora, Boyd and Ruth. With six older sisters Ray was well taken care of and perhaps relieved when another brother, Reed, joined him a couple years later. The Zurich farm had no running water, the kitchen had a dirt floor, an ice house for storing ice for summer use, and everyone shared the outhouse. Money was scarce for the family and much work was needed to just feed and clothe the family. The older children (all the girls) helped in the field with plowing, weeding, thinning, and harvesting the beets. The family sold milk, cream, cottage cheese, eggs, as well as turkeys, chickens, pork, and beef to make ends meet. There was always a respect of nature and the Native American culture in the Ames family. The Blackfoot Indians with Chief Yellow Kidney came at harvest time to gather extra vegetables and meat for their own families. The family went to church regularly in Zurich, which was about three miles from the ranch. Many times they would travel by sleigh in the winter time and their Dad would cover the children with heavy quilts for warmth and comfort. Most often, the kids walked to school. If the weather cooperated, Ray would ride a horse whenever possible. One Sunday as Ray was sitting on a horse talking with his brother, Boyd tapped the horse on the behind and sent Ray flying off the horse and into the spring. Of course, his head found the only rock in the area and the blow put Ray in a coma for a couple days. From the Zurich ranch the family moved to a ranch in Chinook near the sugar factory. This was the first of several more places where they would live in Chinook. The family raised sugar beets and other crops along with sheep, milk cows, farm animals, and good pasture land. Jim Bill was born and joined the family at this time. It seemed that things were just beginning to improve for the family when the Crash of 1929 came and it forced another move, this time to the Sands place north of the railroad tracks in Chinook. They lived there for about four years and during the summers enjoyed numerous crab apple and plum trees. Again, Indians from Browning would come and spend time with the family. At first the children were afraid of them, but the Indians loved Vivian and James because of the food and help they offered them. Often, the family received hand-beaded gifts in return for their kindness. The Ames family later moved into the Mossman house near the fairgrounds where the last Ames child, Anna Mae, was born. These were difficult times for the Ames family and any children old enough to work did so to help sustain the family. Ray was a loving and happy child and wanted to help out with whatever anyone else was doing. However, there were some rumors confirmed by Ray’s older sisters that he and the other younger boys managed to play and rough house more than actually help in the garden or with other household jobs. And although they were responsible for keeping the wood box full, they did it as quickly as possible so they could play outside. In his childhood Ray attended Chinook Grade School and enjoyed the recess and lunches more than the desk time. During the winter, sledding behind the school was a favorite pastime, even after he cut his head one afternoon that resulted in his older sister, Ruth, walking him to the doctor. One of the early memories of Ray was his love of horses. If he had any reason or any excuse to ride, he would. Once on a trip to K. T. Butler's Ranch, south of Chinook, Ray fell off a horse and ruptured his ear drum. However, this did not deter his natural adventuresome spirit. One day Ray decided to drop a 410 shot gun shell down the stove chimney of their home. The small explosion shocked everyone to attention and, luckily, he was okay and nothing was damaged. It does make one wonder what he was doing playing on the roof or who might have “dared” him to do it. He was always part of the neighborhood fun as kids got together in the evenings and played a variety of childhood games. like Hide-N-Seek; Kick the Can; Run, My Sheepy, Run. Baths were part of a regular routine in the Ames household…Can you imagine long-legged Ray taking a bath in the round wash tub in the middle of the kitchen? Or listening to the old radio programs: Little Theater of Times Square, Mert and Marge, Amos and Andy, or Jack Benny? In 1935 the Ames family moved again, to the Lockwood house and two years later, to the Griffin place. It may be a surprise to many, but Ray loved to sing even back in high school. One major role he had was that of the singing captain in the play, the H.M.S Pinafore (a Gilbert and Sullivan creation). He sang solo while standing on the bow of the make-shift ship on stage. The head of the school board, Madge McCartney, praised the operetta as the best ever in Chinook history. Ray went from the stage to the gym floor and was a guard for the Chinook High School Basketball team, known as the Sugarbeeters. During this same time, he and Ronnie Swenson traveled to Havre every Friday night (if they had enough gas for the car) to learn to dance. It must have paid off, since the girls liked his style and he was never lacking a dance partner. Then, he met his “first true love”, Lois Jean LaFrance, and they dated during the last year of high school before Ray graduated in 1942. As he grew into a handsome young man, Ray never forgot his roots and always expressed kindness and understanding to others—his friends, neighbors, family and especially his two younger brothers who always looked up to him. When WWII came it forced many more changes onto this family. Ray, Boyd and Reed all joined the military. Ray enlisted with the Army Air Corps and entered into service on August 5, 1943, in Butte, Montana. During his tour, he was stationed in various stateside locations, including Texas, Louisiana, Georgia, and Colorado. It was during this time that he acquired a strong dislike of grits and hominy, a dislike that continued throughout his lifetime. While in the Air Corps, he completed the Aircrew College training program at the University of Denver on February 19, 1944 and was certified as an “aerial engineer” or, as more commonly known, a tail gunner. After his parents moved to San Clemente in 1944, Ray went to see them while on leave and asked a buddy to join him to see his parents’ new home. One morning as they were conversing with Ray’s parents in their small kitchen, Ray decided to “flick” his mother’s behind, just like he and Jim Bill had done to their siblings (and who knows who else) for years. If you knew Vivian, you would also know that this was a mistake—she turned quickly and decked Ray to the floor. He laid there stunned, but not as surprised as all the others were in the kitchen that day. Later, Ray’s buddy cautiously remarked that he would never, ever mess with Mrs. Ames! Ray had a great sense humor, but it probably wore thin on at least one occasion during military training. His younger sister, Anna Mae, enjoyed her paper dolls and in those days, she cut out the dolls and carefully stored them in a magazine to avoid creases and tears. It seems the magazine was accidentally shipped off to Ray in a “care package.” As his buddies helped him excitedly open the box of cookies, treats and magazines from his parents, the paper dolls flew everywhere—can’t you just see the look on Ray’s face? He sternly (and without humor) told his family in his next letter, “Never send me paper dolls again! On February 18, 1946, he received an honorable discharge as a corporal in the 3021st Army Air Corps stationed at the Las Vegas Army Air field in Nevada. For his service Ray was awarded the Good Conduct Medal, the American Campaign Medal, and the WWII Victory Medal. He moved to San Clemente and began his house painting profession while working for Leo Smith Construction for a short time. (This was back when San Clemente was pushing toward a population of 500.) As he painted, he convinced his Mother to wash his work clothes, but it crossed the line when he also asked her to iron them. Instead, he enticed Anna Mae to iron for 25 cents an article. Little did she know that he expected his pants to be pressed with a military crease, and his shirts, with three pleats in the back just like his Army Air Corps uniform. Makes one wonder how many compliments he received from clients for his “sharp looking” outfit (or how many chuckles he got from his friends at the local donut shop). As he settled into life in San Clemente, he still managed to spend time with his younger sister and they often frequented the local ice cream parlor. On one occasion, however, Ray took Anna Mae (seven years his junior) to the ice cream parlor and left her so he could spend time with friends, with the plan to pick her up later. Well, when he didn’t come back and the parlor was closing, Anna Mae had to walk home alone. It seems that he made his way to a local bar or a dance, but Anna Mae never really knew the rest of the story or what his folks discussed with him later. This experience aside, Anna Mae was always the little sister he protected and watched over. It was during this time he bought his first car, a maroon 1940 Pontiac Convertible. He would often take Anna Mae on drives and he actually let her drive it on more than one occasion. In 1947 he traded in the Pontiac for a used 1940 light blue Oldsmobile Deluxe convertible valued at $1182.80. Yes, that was the exact cost before the trade-in was deducted—Ray kept records on everything! During the late 1940’s, the city of San Clemente sponsored dances and often a dance band from Camp Pendleton would play for them. As you might have guessed, Ray was quite a dancer and being a very handsome young man, he had his pick for each dance. Rumor has it that there were two gals in particular that “chased” this good looking eligible bachelor. One of them actually baked him a special cake, but the blue frosting was a little too much for him. This came as a surprise to many, since blue was always his favorite color, but apparently not when it was on a cake. Ray joined a bowling team and represented the Rendezous, a San Clemente social club, for ten years, with only a temporarily absence when he left again for time in the service. Their tailored, satin shirts brought high fashion to another level in San Clemente! In August of 1950, Ray was recalled for active duty in the Air Force, joining the 452nd Bomb Wing. This was the first U.S. Air Force Reserve unit to go into combat after training at the George Air Force Base in Victorville, California. He served as a tail gunner in a B26 light bomber in the Korean War. He completed numerous combat missions before his plane was hit and caught fire forcing the crew to bail out of the plane. Since the plane was at a low altitude, many parachutes did not open completely causing injury to many of the crew members. Luckily, Ray suffered only a broken leg and not his life. On March 3, 1951, Brigadier General Luther W. Sweetser honored Sgt. Ray Ames with the presentation of the Air Force Air Medal in a ceremony at the 452nd Bomb Wing Headquarters in Japan. The citation read in part, “For meritorious service while engaged in aerial flight against the enemy. Sergeant Ray D. Ames distinguished himself while participating in combat missions over Korea. Enemy ground fire was frequently encountered and the threat of enemy fighter attack was always present. While serving as a gunner on a B-26 light bomber this airman demonstrated great skill in the performance of his duties.” Ray separated from the Air Force on February 1, 1952 and was officially discharged on August 5,1953. When he arrived back in San Clemente, he returned to the painting trade and began to build his business on fair, honest work for others. He met and was smittened by Margaret Epling and began to court her. In fact, when Ray went to talk to Margaret's father and ask for her hand in marriage, her father asked Ray what he knew about raising children, since Margaret’s children, Mary Lee and Tom, were still at home. Ray's response was, "I have seven sisters." That’s all Mr. Smith needed to know. Ray and Margaret were married on November 3, 1952 and he had an instant family. In this same year, Ray was part of a newly formed Rotary Club that wanted to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop. Since they didn’t have any money to do so, he agreed to go to a meeting of the San Clemente Men’s Club in the fall of 1952 to ask for a donation. Well, he received a donation, but they also voted him in as the new president of the club in that same year. He later kidded that he must still be the president since the club never officially disbanded even though they had given away all their money. And, by the way, he also became the leader of that first Boy Scout Troop his Rotary Club ever sponsored. Later, he became a founding father of the San Clemente Elks, No. 4. However, his painting profession and civic responsibilities didn’t hinder his love of gardening, a skill and hobby that he learned from his father who loved the earth and farming. Ray’s talent for gardening was evidenced by the multitude of plants that adorned his home: plumeria, bird of paradise, symbidiums, roses, orchids, lavender, camellia, and the peach, orange and tangerine trees that bordered the yard. Ray’s reputation for house painting thrived during his entire career. It was said that he could paint a house and never need a drop cloth, since he was such a first-rate painter. He proudly explained that he never had to advertise, but received job after job on referral. On one occasion a client was so pleased with his work that, upon her death, a monetary thank you for him was stipulated in her will. Although words such as, meticulous, precise, and superior describe his painting, more important was his commitment of treating others with care and honesty that earned him the respect and trust of others. Ray loved his family. He and Margaret were generous in helping them with college expenses and business startup expenses. In 1978 Ray took his sister, Ruth, on a whale watching trip off the coast of California before her trip to the Philippines. Having spent time in Southeast Asia, he was concerned that his sister was planning to spend 18 months in Manila. Even a boat trip and his discouraging words could not convince her to stay in the states, but, he did give Ruth a huge umbrella to use during the monsoon rains and for a defense weapon--just in case she needed it. Ray and Margaret both loved fishing and enjoyed their fishing trips, especially to Montana where they spent time each year. Their favorite spot was Lake Koocanusa where they camped in their fifth wheeler for an extended time each summer. They would fish for kokanee salmon and each evening would pressure can or smoke their daily catch. Throughout the years, the Ames family created many opportunities to gather for reunions as families continued to grow and more memories were born. One event was held at the Coronado Beach near San Diego in 1986. Another took place at Hauser Lake in Montana in 1991. Whether it was a reunion, an important birthday or a holiday, Ray would be there, especially if it gave him time with his family (or one more opportunity to go fishing.) It seems that his attention to detail also carried over into holiday times. One of the fondest memories of Ray for Amaya, his grand daughter, was that of decorating the Christmas tree with him as a child. When it came time to decorate, he would put everything else aside and teach her and her sister how to hang tinsel (one, yes one, strand at a time) and how to perfectly position the ornaments on the tree. He was very patient with them even when they tried to throw handfuls of tinsel at the tree to speed up the process. Another memory of Amaya’s is that of Ray’s driving with her grandmother. One time she went with them for dinner and a couple drinks at the Elk's Lodge in San Clemente. On the drive home her grandmother, Margaret, said to Ray: "This is a first. I don't think we have ever made it home without beeping the horn." They laughed about that one--he did like to use a horn to greet people. In the last 15 years of their life together Margaret developed many health challenges. When she was ultimately confined to a wheelchair, they continued to fish and Ray helped her get into and out of the boat so she could enjoy her beloved sport. Their little dog Sammy also went traveling with them and was their constant companion on trips, as well as a companion for Margaret when Ray was working. During her last years, Ray was her constant support and devoted “caregiver” until her death in 1998 at the age of 86. Ray and Margaret loved each other very much and were also best of friends. Ray would tell you that throughout his married life of over 45 years with Margaret that they never had an argument. As one grand daughter said, “I would like to say that I will be forever grateful to Ray for being a wonderful husband to my grandmother. I know that they loved each other more than words can express.” Ray always managed to keep up with current events and enjoyed discussing fishing, politics, taxes, gardening and even the weather forecast for the Pacific Ocean. In conversations with visitors, he often mentioned what was happening back in Chinook since he still subscribed to their weekly paper that is now known as the “Blaine County Journal News-Opinion.” And you would always find copies of a well-read L.A. Times on the coffee table. Ray continued painting until he was diagnosed with cancer in the late 1990s, but this didn’t stop him from other activities. One of Ray’s favorite “hang outs” was the local Winchell’s Donut Shop on El Camino, drinking coffee and munching his favorite donut, a raised glazed twist. In March of 2003, Rays was honored at the 75th Annual San Clemente Parade and, you guessed it, he was the guest passenger in a convertible. Ray usually greeted friends and people with a casual wave and a “howdy.” Several times he waved at a woman as she regularly walked her dog past his home. That was just the beginning. During a charity barbeque at the Elks, he again ran into Ramona and gave her that charming smile of his. They spent more and more time together, swimming in the pool, eating at local restaurants, and just talking and sharing experiences. Ray surprised everyone when he later married Ramona on June 1st, 2002. She brought happiness, humor and energy into his life again. Ray and Ramona reminded one of teenagers as they joked and enjoyed each other’s company. In 2004 Ray was honored by family and friends in a surprise celebration for his 80th birthday. As part of the festivities, Ray and Ramona headed to the Mexican Riviera for his first ocean cruise. Rumor has it that Ramona even convinced him to purchase a new dark-blue suit for their evening dinners at the Captain’s table. And if he could have, he would have dropped a fishing line from the stern. As Ray continued to struggle with health issues, Ramona cared for and supported him as the cancer continued to impact his quality of life--his friends and family members will forever be grateful for Ramona’s loving care. She even ironed his t-shirts and put a strong, shiny crease in his blue jeans. As 2006 rolled around, his struggle continued. On January 5th just before midnight, Joshua, his 3-year-old nephew (and son of Ramona’s brother), provided Ray with his very own stuffed monkey…in Joshua’s words, “this is to protect you, Uncle Ray.” Even as the pain and illness took over his body, he continued to demonstrate the courage and dignity that exemplified his life. When asked what he would like to have remembered about him, he said, “I always tried to do the best I could…I don’t think it was the best now, but at the time, I thought it was. I was always FAIR and SQUARE.” There is probably no one who would disagree. As one nephew, Gary Olsen, recently related: “What I remember is Uncle Ray's quiet, all knowing, demeanor which made him respected by his peers - whether they were neighbors, fishing pals, family, or the gas station attendant or grocery clerk. In the late sixties, I and some college buddies arrived in San Clemente to hang out during spring break. With Ray's permission all of us invaded his home for a few days, fished with him, swam in his pool, and constantly raided his kitchen. Ray would nod and smile as though our behavior reminded him of something he, too, had done in his younger days. I think he was a walking example of what helped make this country what it is today. He and those like him are probably what Tom Brokaw had in mind when he wrote the book The Greatest Generation.” As we each think about Ray, each one of us will carry with us our own special memories, but one thing is certain—Ray loved life and he demonstrated that love every day to those around him. I am sure he is with us today with his charming grin and that twinkle in his eye that made him special to us all. ********************************************************** Ray is survived by his wife, Ramona Ames, three sisters, Aurora Riley of Provo, UT, Ruth Olsen of Logan, UT, and Anna Mae McCurdy of Hemet, CA; and one brother, Jim Bill Ames of Victor, MT. Ray was preceded in death by his parents; James William and Vivian Anna Jacobson Ames; his first wife, Margaret Smith Ames; four sisters, Vanda Trotter, Virginia Culbertson, Madge Johnson, and Mildred Dodd; and two brothers, Boyd, and Reed Ames. He is also survived by a step daughter, Mary Lee Epling, a step son, Tyler Klavana; and several step grand children, Steve Sando, Mike Sando, Amaya Epling, and Eden Epling; and over 48 nieces and nephews. Complied by Carol Jean Olsen, niece and daughter of Ruth Ames Olsen)